An army sergeant walks into a whorehouse and approaches the madam and says, "My name is Sgt Major Dick and I'm here for a woman!" The madam immediately escorts the soldier upstairs and selects the best call girl they have for him.
Sgt Major Dick immediately disrobes and is standing with his hands on his hips while he looks at the prostitute waiting for him on the bed. He says, "My name is Sgt Dick, been in the army thirty years, and I'm a master of my mind and body, DICK, ATTEN-SHUN. Immediately his penis becomes instantly erect!
The prostitute is in awe and asks how he can do it. The Sgt Major replies, "Like I said, I've been in the army thirty years and I have total control over my mind and body, DICK, AT EASE." His penis immediately goes limp.
The prostitute still can't get over what she saw and asks him to make it hard then soft then hard again.
She asks him again how he does it. The Sgt Major shouts, "I have already told you honey, I have been in the army thirty years, and I am master of my mind and body, DICK, ATTEN-SHUN. His penis goes instantly hard. Then he gives the following command, "DICK- AT EASE!" The Sgt Major looks down and is amazed to see his penis is fully erect. The Sgt Major is now fuming, and says, "I'm going to tell you one more time, DICK-AT EASE!" No luck. His penis is still hard. He yells "God Dammit!" and moves to the side of the bed and starts to masturbate vigorously.
The prostitute asks, "What the hell is going on?"
The Sgt Major replies, "This soldier disobeyed a direct order, and I'm giving him a dishonourable discharge!"