Turning 60 means:

Fortune tellers read your face instead of your palm.

Your favorite station on cable is the Weather Channel.

You shop at Target and Walmart for the great clothes.

People call you spry and youre not offended.

The old spark takes a little more blowing to get going.

You know your way around but you dont want to go anywhere.

Your wife suggests you pull in your stomach and you get a hernia doing it.

You're not only interested in automobile airbags, you've become one.

The candles on your cake set off the sprinkler system.

You still miss your high school car, but you cant remember your classmates.

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