Why You Shouldn't Play Hard To Get

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Why You Shouldn't Play Hard To Get
by Kristen Sollee
KAPPIT
Source: womenshealthmag.com
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While it's sometimes tempting to play it cool on a date, a new study found that men are actually more attracted to responsive women. So maybe don't wait a week to text back that guy who you had an amazing date with last night. 

The research, published in the Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, used several studies to look into how responsiveness in a potential partner increases your sexual interest and attraction to them. Responsiveness, or niceness, is supposed to show that you are concerned with another person's welfare, which, in theory, builds intimacy and makes them more attracted to you because caring is hot.

The first study had 112 single undergraduates discuss a recent negative event with an opposite-sex stranger. They then rated the strangers responsiveness, perceived femininity/masculinity, and sexual attractiveness. Men who perceived a stranger as more responsive also viewed her as more feminine and more sexually attractive. Interestingly, women did not rate responsive men to be particularly masculine or sexually attractive, but researchers suggest this isn't because women don't like nice guys we may just be more skeptical of a nice guy's intentions right off the bat.

Then they looked at how this translates to sexual arousal and dating potential. When men found women responsive, it led to heightened sexual arousal and a greater desire for a relationship. So basically, being nice and receptive made men more sexually attracted to you and more interested in dating you long term. Again, just to make sure were clear here, the totally shocking dating secret to come out of this study is being nice.

While every dating situation is different, this research does show that men respond with overwhelming attraction to women who they perceive as responsive. This doesn't mean you need to grin your way through every early interaction or be overly nice if you don't mean it, but playing it too cool might send the signal that you're just not that into him. It only takes 12 minutes to make a first impression, so try these seven ways to ace a first date or this foolproof flirting technique to make it count.

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